Narcissists are people who appear charming and confident at first sight. But they are in fact deeply insecure and blame everyone else for everything. Denying their own mistakes and twisting facts. The need for permanent recognition is like the air the narcissist needs to breathe. That often goes along with disrespecting others. They are unable to reflect on themselves and often destroy their own partner inwardly.
Anyone who has experienced this knows the story.
Narcissism has only been recognized since 1980 as a personality disorder in the classification system for mental disorders (DSM).
Does it matter to you? No!
Why a person develops a narcissistic personality disorder is still unclear. Some assume the reasons in childhood, others assume genetic or physiological predisposition.
Does it matter to you? No!
What does matter to you is …
To recognize why you were an ideal partner for the narcissist. Often it is those very empathic and caring human beings who are especially attracted to narcissists and vice versa.
Which deeper beliefs of yours have enabled the narcissist to partner with you? Which behavioral patterns in a partnership have paved the way for the narcissist?
Conscious Uncoupling Coaching is all about these questions: why were you a good match for the narcissist? What can you change about yourself to avoid this in the future? Change and find yourself in the process.
A first hint: do not try to convince a narcissist of your opinion, of what´s called “the truth” or “reality”. This consumes time and energy and will not lead to any result. Most importantly, it will not get you inner peace.
What is more important to you: how do you finally let go of the narcissist? What forms of communication with a narcissist are there that will not hurt you? And also: what are the ways to constructively live with a narcissistic co-parenting?
Always remember: there is a life “after”. Even for you, a fulfilling, appreciative partnership is possible. Do not suffer in silence, stop saying “never again” to a partner. But rather face up to the topic and solve it in a way that is truly beneficial to you.
Not easy. Not easy at all. But possible.
Picture credits: Pixabay/trinhkien91
